I had amazing sex with my toyboy lover before he dumped me for his ex – I feel so heartbroken and used

DEAR DEIDRE: DATING a man 15 years younger than me was thrilling – and I loved the adventurous sex – but now he’s dumped me for his ex.

He convinced me that we shared something special, now I’m starting to wonder if he was merely using me as a distraction.

I’m 48, and he’s 33. We started talking five months ago when we matched on a dating app.

Initially, I was apprehensive about the age gap. I had never dated anyone younger than me, but he was so attractive and charming, I agreed to meet.

From the moment we set eyes on each other, our chemistry was electric.

Our conversations flowed effortlessly, and the sexual tension was undeniable.

We spent hours in the bedroom and most of our free time together.

My feelings developed quickly, and we grew very close. I truly believed that he cared for me.

He briefly mentioned that he’d recently broken up with his long-term ex-girlfriend.

It seems she had decided to leave to travel to Australia, and I assumed it would all stay in the past.

Little did I know that when she returned home early, he would run back to her and leave me hanging.

I knew something was up when he went silent and stopped texting or answering my calls.

I was so confused and hurt for a week trying to understand what went wrong.

Then he finally called me, told me he was back with his ex and instructed me not to contact him again. He was so cold with me that I almost didn’t recognise it was him.

I feel so heartbroken and used.

DEIDRE SAYS: Of course you are feeling hurt and used. This man has shown you who he really is ­­– someone who is happy to discard others without any consideration or respect.

As hard as it may be right now, tell yourself you’ve had a lucky escape. You deserve so much more than someone who is comfortable dropping you without a second thought.

It will take time to heal and get over this, but eventually you will begin to wonder what you ever saw in him.

My support packs, Moving On and Mend Your Broken Heart, should help you.

HUSBAND’S TURNED IN TO A BULLY

DEAR DEIDRE: I’VE had enough of the constant bullying from my husband. In his eyes, I can never do anything right.

I’m 35, he’s 38, and we’ve been together for seven years.

We used to have a happy relationship, but over time things have grown hostile.

My husband is a workaholic, and his job has been stressful over the last few years. Unfortunately he takes all of that frustration out on me.

I feel like his punch bag. Every day I deal with constant sulks, moodiness and name-calling, and whenever I try to stand up for myself, he belittles me and wears me down.

DEIDRE SAYS: Your husband’s behaviour is completely out of order. He sounds like he’s being very unkind and abusive towards you.

His comments are clearly getting you down. If you really love and care for someone, you wouldn’t be treating them this way.

If you want to try to resolve this, you need to tell him how he is making you feel. My support pack, Standing Up For Yourself, will help.

If things don’t improve, you need to consider if staying with him is right for you. Contact Women’s Aid (womensaid.org.uk) for support.

ALWAYS FANCIED MY MUM-IN-LAW

DEAR DEIDRE: AFTER decades of trying to deny them, I can’t move on from my feelings for my mother-in-law.

I know it’s wrong, but no matter how hard I try, she occupies so much of my headspace.

I’m 59, my wife is 51, and we’ve been married for 30 years. Her mother is 69 and has always been so lovely with me.

From the moment I met her, I always had a crush on her. Since I was young, I knew I liked older women, and there was always something about her that left me curious.

I always tried to push it to the back of my mind for the sake of my relationship.

Over the years my marriage has stagnated, and I’d be lying if I said the boredom hadn’t driven me to daydreaming and fantasising about her mum.

I never thought there would be a reality where we could be together. She was always happily married to my father-in-law.

However, he passed away a few years ago, and she’s been alone ever since. I know it hit her hard, and she’s been struggling without company.

I can’t help but find myself wondering “what if?” If you never try, you’ll never know.

The last thing I want to do is hurt my wife, but the temptation to be with my mother-in-law is growing harder to fight by the day.

DEIDRE SAYS: You say you don’t want to hurt your wife, but attempting to cheat on her with her mother would be the ultimate betrayal.

While you can’t help having a crush on your mother-in-law, making any kind of advance on her would create unnecessary hurt and implode your family.

Instead of fixating on these fantasies, you need to redirect the energy and focus on your relationship with your wife.

It’s clear that you’re unhappy, and something needs to change.

Carefully read my support pack, Relationship MOT, to help you work things through.